Little Johnny wanted a bike for Christmas. He asked his mother but she said to write a letter to Santa. Having just been in a nativity play he said he would prefer to write to Baby Jesus to which she thought was a great idea.
Johnny went upstairs and started on his letter. He wrote
"Dear Jesus, I have been very good this year, can I please have a bike for Christmas?"
Then he re-read it and decided it wasn't authentic enough, so he tore it up and tried again:
"Dear Jesus, I have been good most of the time, can I please have a bike for Christmas?"
This time he decided it wasn't convincing enough so again he re-tried:
"Dear Jesus, I will be very good, especially if you give me a bike for Christmas."
Now little Johnny still wasn't perfectly happy so he went outside to play while he thought it over. While out in the street he walked past a house with a virgin mary in the yard. He snuck into the yard, stole the statue and walked it home under his T-shirt. Johnny then went to his bedroom, hid her under his bed, and wrote his final letter:
"Dear Jesus, If you ever want to see your mother again, you had better get me a bike for Chirstmas!"